Staceyann Chin

Denmark Again!!!

amidst the whir of vacuum cleaners
in the lobby of the hotel

Asian voices
I assume them Korean

only because I assume them so
they might be something else entirely
and I might be wrong

in this hotel in Copenhagen
the smallest room I have ever seen

and Marcus is snuggled into new understanding
and I am missing my woman
who is missing me

somewhere in New York City
Brooklyn
and parks
and how did I come to fit so easily
into a city

not of my birth

yesterday flew by mad fast
it was mad packed
with plane rides
and delays
and studio interviews

two times I performed
two shows

and I was so tired
I had to fall asleep without the leisure

of thinking of you
all along the English alphabet

I stopped at the letter G
and was ashamed

that I could not stay awake
for that breathy letter H

but I have thought of you 52 times
having been through the ABCs

twice already today
and noon just passed by my hot chocolate
made from the machine in the lobby cafe

one lone white fellow
at the table across from me

and I lost a journal yesterday
wrote poems about the things of greatest value
I have sometimes lost

my mind
my mother
my hatred for her

how I think of her gently now
warrior woman making choices I might spend
more than this lifetime trying
to understand

pretty woman
my mother brown like my lover like em

strong
independent
and brutal

it seems that way from far away

but hurricanes
are gusts of wind that decided to grow bigger

I found the journal hours later in the airport

and the winds threaten the place
I call home when I am missing my grandmother

how removed it all seems

I am always in Scandinavia when shit happens at home

blackout in New York
election drama in 2000

for the American 911 I was in Jamaica
hours landed
from New York

things happen when I fly

Copenhagen was all open arms and a room
reminiscent of the Nuyorican

and Nicolette
read poems all the way from Switzerland
and Frederik
and Klaus were wonderful

and I will always love these white faces
that provide contrast for the faces from Burundi
and Eritrea
and Turkey

women are beautiful
when painted brown

in a crowd of Danes
there were Asians and Indians
and maybe globalization is doing more than outsourcing American Jobs

Gateway is moving to India
and my cousin in Jamaica can call me all the time

because she can call America all the time
she has to be able to call
to persuade you
to pay your credit card bill

all the mixed babies
are redefining the idea
of borders

and what a Swede looks like
and what the child of a WASP looks like
or what friends he may or may not choose to have sushi with

or play hardcore unforgiving
scrabble

(any takers Mr. Mali?)

and I love my life in New York
even when I hate it

I would hate to be hating my life
without knowing I have the details of New York to complain about

I just need a little repreive for "me and my lover"
to "make love on Wednesdays" (digital art, Towkwase Dyson)

kisses from the lobby of the hotel with smallest shower I have ever seen,
Staceyann

Posted by staceyann at September 10, 2004 09:10 AM